Memory can be terribly cruel!
Aurore, lying numb and tired after a few hours' heavy sleep, felt
the full force of this cruelty.
One by one, pictures which she would long all her life to blot
out from her mind rose before her aching senses. Visions of shame
and of cowardice which she felt would forever after leave a stain
upon her soul. Even now memory most cruel brought the blush of
humbled pride to her cheeks.
She, Aurore de Marigny, daughter of one of the proudest houses
in France, claiming kinship with Royalty, the apple of her father's
eyes, the worshipped mistress of a regal ancestral home, she had
grovelled at a plebeian's feet; on her knees she had begged him
to set her free, entreated him with words that in the past she
would only have spoken to her King.
She had begged him, on her knees, with hands clinging to his rough
clothes, to let her go back to Marigny and to her father; begged
him to look on his vengeance as complete, since he had broken
her spirit and humiliated her so that she would never dare look
one of her own caste in the face again.
And memory mocked her with that picture of herself, lying like
a crumpled heap of silk and laces at the feet of the man whom
she hated and loathed and despised beyond what she would have
thought herself capable of feeling. And through it all he had
remained cool, sarcastic, indifferent.
"Do not cry, ma mie," he had said once: "you
will make your eyes red."
And another time: "In Heaven's name, do not raise your voice.
You don't want our friends down below to know that we have already
embarked on matrimonial quarrels."
But the words that memory recalled more insistently were more
fateful than all:
"While you are my submissive wife no one dare touch your
father or you; but if you choose to leave me, no power on earth
will save either of you from the guillotine. I care naught,"
he added presently, "about that arrogant father of yours:
let him die a dog's death, for aught I care, but I do not choose
to see my wife's pretty head roll into the same basket as those
of the enemies of France."
"I hate you," she had murmured once. "I shall always
hate you."
"I have no love for you, either," he had retorted coolly,
"but we shall get used to each other."
And when in her agony of mind she had cried out, "Why - why
have you done this? You hate me, you say - then why not let me
go?"
"Because..." The word had escaped him, vehement and
fierce; the cruel expression she had learned to fear had flashed
for a few seconds out of his eyes. But the next moment he pulled
himself together, seemed, indeed, to shed his fury like a mantle.
A mocking smile chased away the ferocious glance, and he said
lightly:
"Because you are beautiful, ma mie; you are my wife
and I wish to keep you. That is all."
In the olden days Aurore de Marigny, even when she was little
more than a child, had been wont to despise the airs and graces,
the megrims and mild hysterics in which her elegant friends so
often indulged. She had always been a fearless child: at games,
on horseback, nothing frightened her. In an age when women affected
the weaknesses of their sex as a sign of aristocratic birth, she
would find joy in breaking in an untamed colt or accompanying
her father in his shooting expeditions after wolf or wild boar
in the forests of Ardennes. She had never known fear until now,
when a beggarly caitiff held her like a slave in thrall. But with
memory's cruel insistence there came back to her the knowledge
that she was afraid; that there was one man in the world the sight
of whom caused a quiver of abject fear to go right through her
body, the sound of whose footfall caused every drop of blood to
flow back to her heart. Why, she couldn't say.
It was that despicable fear which at this fateful hour had taken
such hold of her that, even while his formidable arm encircled
her waist and raised her from the ground where she had been cowering
like a frightened beast, her senses suddenly forsook her, her
head fell back, her teeth chattered as if in ague, her limbs felt
as cold as ice. Broken and bruised by the terrible mental and
physical struggle, she was numb and limp, had not one spark of
fight left in her, or the strength of a kitten. She felt herself
lifted off the ground and laid down somewhere, where it was soft
and warm and sweet smelling. She heard the dreaded footfall receding
from her, the opening of a door, and then a call.
There were other people in the room presently - a man and a woman.
Aurore couldn't see them; she had not the energy to raise her
eyelids; but gentle kindly hands undressed her, took off her shoes
and stockings, combed her hair and moistened her face with sweet-smelling
water. She felt herself being tucked up in a soft downy bed, and
soft murmurs that sounded pitiful and motherly soothed her throbbing
senses.
A man's voice, persuasive and authoritative, said, "Try and
drink this, citizeness, it will make you sleep." She obeyed
and drank the slightly bitter liquid that was held to her lips.
After that she lay placid and quiet and, presently, must have
dropped off to sleep.
